Parents are an example for children from a young age. Until parents die, children always look at them to learn. They will mimic, follow, compare and form their personalities. Therefore, the following good parenting principles will be very helpful in guiding the development of children.
1. All actions will be mirrored
From everyday actions like exercising, being on time, good and bad habits, etc, to the way parents treat others. Children will observe and follow. We see this is the most important principle. What a mother does, whether she actively teaches her children or not, will leave a deep impression on the minds of children. Therefore, do not behave according to your emotions or lack of careful consideration. Instead, ask yourself: “How do I want to handle this? How will this have consequences?”
2. Don’t be too pampered
It is simply impossible to spoil a child with too much care. Although we often assume that a spoiled child is due to excessive care. The experience of parenting shared by pregnant women shows that this is not the case. The real cause is things we give children because we think that is a way to show love:
- Being too lenient with the child;
- Lowering expectations for children;
- Satisfy all of your child’s needs – or needs – physically.
3. Parenting means participate in child’s life
This will take a lot of time and effort of the mother. That means she will have to rethink and rearrange her priorities. Usually, she has to sacrifice her hobbies to spend time with her children. She need to be with the kids both physically and mentally.
Note that this does not mean you should do your child’s homework, or correct her/his homework. Homework is a tool for teachers to assess a child’s performance. If you do it, the teacher will not know what your child has learned.
In this case, it is best for you to be with your child, supervising the school hours and your child’s attitudes. Good parenting means mom should only remind and encourage her/him to study, and nothing more than that.
4. Change the feeding method to suit your child’s age
Stay closely to your child’s development. They grow up day by day, and grow very fast. Moms can see their words and actions gradually change from year to year.
The way mom taught the child how to use toilet is also the motivation for 3-year-olds to constantly say “no”. That is the ability of the child to be independent in thinking.
The intellectual development helps 13-year-old kids to learn and explore while at school and also help them become “headache” at dinner.
5. Create and set rules
If you do not control your children ‘s behaviors, it will be difficult for them to take care of themselves. They become confused by everyday problems and lose control. At all times, mothers need to identify answers to three issues:
- Where is my child?
- Who are they playing with?
- What are they doing?
The rules that children learn from their mothers will form the rules that they apply to themselves.
However, in parenting, mothers should not control every little bit. Once your child reaches secondary school, you need to let your child do his or her own homework, make choices and not interfere much.
6. Nurture your child’s independence
Setting boundaries will help your child build self-control. Encouraging self-reliance helps children build self-direction. To be successful in life, you will need both of these traits.
Normally, if the mother educates her child successfully, when she reaches puberty, she will have quite good control. Now, instead of understanding that and proud of accomplishments, many mothers think that this is a manifestation of rebellion and disobedience. Young children want to be in control because it is part of their nature. Children want to make their own decisions instead of being controlled by someone else – even if it’s their mother.
7. Consistency in parenting is key
If a parent’s rules change day by day without any pattern, or you may force the child to act abnormally, then when a child misconducts, the one who is at fault is the mother, not the child. Mother’s most powerful disciplinary tool in parenting is consistency. Identify your “no-deal” areas to force your child to obey. The more power you rely on wisdom – not strength – the more they will obey and less resist.
8. Do not use violence in teaching your child
In any case of good parenting, mom should NEVER hit me. Children who are regularly punished in the butt, on their bodies, worse is slapped, will be more likely to be violent towards friends. They will be teased more often and will use their arms to settle disputes with others more.
Instead of hitting them, there are many ways to treat them, including “time out” technique. It is a fine for not letting children play, doing chores or not letting them go out … These measures are more effective.
9. Explain in detail mom’s rules and decisions
Being good at parenting is to help your children set goals. Unfortunately, we often see mothers chose the opposite direction:
- Explain too much to young children – while they do not yet understand, and
- Explain little to your child – when they need specific and clear words.
What is obvious to the mother will be “not obvious” to the 10-year-old. Children do not have priorities and judgments, let alone experiences as mothers do.
10. Respect them
The best way to gain respect from children is to respect them. You should respect your child as much as anyone else:
- Speak politely with your child.
- Respect your child’s views.
- Listen carefully when your child talks to you.
- Be kind to your children.
- Try to please your child when possible.
Children treat others the same way parents treat them. The relationship between mother and child is the foundation of their relationship with others.
For example, if a child is picky eater, don’t be too obsessed. Children have their own tastes, and vary by age. You do not want to turn dinner into a fight. At the same time, do not make mistakes with storing many fast-food in the refrigerator. If mom does not buy harmful food, children will not eat them. Image from https://pixabay.com/